Vive La Revolucion

One of the most interesting things about chickens is the pecking order, the social hierarchy of the group. It's a fairly nuanced thing--certainly as nuanced as any group of cliques in a middle or high school of your choice.

Thus far, there hadn't really been anything that interesting going on in the hierarchy. Yves was the top cock, so far as I could tell, but there wasn't really any fighting going on as there wasn't much to fight about. Their hormones shouldn't be kicking in for several more weeks; there are no preferred "higher" roosts than others, and they all have plenty of space to eat and drink at the same time.

I believe I touched off a firestorm, however.

Flashback: For a week or so, I'd been giving them oats as a treat, which they quite enjoyed. They'd gather around and eat out of my hand. My favorites would climb up and down my arm... they'd make half-contented, half-excited little peeping noises. Just darling.

I'd tried a few different things that they were meant to like, but the oats were most successful. The earthworm I brought seemed to disturb them more than anything else. They refused to touch it.

However, I'd read that they often enjoyed mealworms, so when I was in town recently, I purchased some. Perhaps it was a fatal error... the end of the monarchy.

When I lowered my hand into the brooder, they squealed and trilled like schoolgirls. It was instantaneous. they could not contain their urgency. They dove for my hand like vipers, and when they'd plucked a tasty morsel between dainty chicken lips, they ran around in tiny circles looking for a private place to eat it--a place where no other bird could snatch it away.

Indeed, the frenzy was so great that the other birds were just as likely to grab the first mealworm they saw rather than come all the way back to The Hand for one that had not been claimed, yet. And with jealous eyes they would guard their precious, squirming morsel as it bound them into the darkness.

The mealworms were gone in a matter of minutes. I had purchased 50 of them, so they got (ideally) 7 or so each. For some time after, they were a society bereft, and the best forager, which turned out to be the bright-eyed Marguerite, managed to find one that had been dropped into the litter in the chaos.

Then, silence descended again, and that feeling that overtakes one post-elation. After an hour or two they seemed to settle into their usual routine.

However, there has been a great revolution being fought today, and I can't help but wonder if it has some connection to yesterday's incident.

Yves is being challenged as top cock by another male whom I had not as yet named, but whom I now call Napoleon. On his right wing is a feather askew, which reminds me for some reason of that little lock of hair on the Emperor's forehead, as portrayed in so many portraits. Or perhaps it reminds me of his hand tucked into his jacket.

At any rate, there is no real fighting still... only the bouncing of chests together, but little Napoleon seems very determined. Determined to do what, one wonders?



Did Yves get more than his share of mealworms? Is Napoleon trying to make a

Declaration of the Rights of Chicken and of the Citizen

Approved by the National Assembly of France, 26 August 1789 (Altered)

The representatives of the French chickens, organised as a National Assembly, believing that the ignorance, neglect or contempt of the rights of chickens are the sole cause of public calamities and of the corruption of governments, have determined to set forth in a solemn declaration the natural, unalienable and sacred rights of chickens, in order that this declaration, being constantly before all the members of the social body, shall remind them continually of their rights and duties; in order that the acts of the legislative power, as well as those of the executive power, may be compared at any moment with the objects and purposes of all political institutions and may thus be more respected; and, lastly, in order that the grievances of the citizens, based hereafter upon simple and incontestable principles, shall tend to the maintenance of the constitution and redound to the happiness of all. Therefore the National Assembly recognises and proclaims, in the presence and under the auspices of Llysse, the following rights of chickens and of the citizen:

Articles:

1 Chickens are born and remain free and equal in rights. Social distinctions may be founded only upon the general good.

2 The aim of the pecking order is the preservation of the natural and imprescriptible rights of chickens. These rights are liberty, food, security and resistance to oppression.

3 The principle of all sovereignty resides essentially in the flock. No body nor individual may exercise any authority which does not proceed directly from the flock.

4 Liberty consists in the freedom to do everything which injures no one else; hence the exercise of the natural rights of each chicken has no limits except those which assure to the other members of the society the enjoyment of the same rights. These limits can only be determined by Llysse.

5 Llysse can only prohibit such actions as are hurtful to the flock. Nothing may be prevented which is not forbidden by Llysse, and no one may be forced to do anything not provided for by Llysse.

6 Llysse protects the expression of the general will or instinct. Every chicken has a right to associate personally with her. She must be the same for all, whether it protects or punishes. All citizens, being equal in the eyes of Llysse, are equally eligible to all dignities and to all public positions and occupations, according to their abilities, and without distinction except that of their virtues and talents.

7 No chicken shall be abused, manhandled or killed except in the cases and according to the forms prescribed by Llysse. Anyone soliciting, transmitting, executing, or causing to be executed, any arbitrary order, shall be punished. But any chicken shall submit without delay to Llysse, as resistance constitutes an offense.

8 Llysse shall provide for medicine only as is strictly and obviously necessary, and no one shall suffer to take it except it be inflicted in virtue of the alternative of death or long suffering.

9 As all chickens are held innocent until they shall have been declared guilty, if death shall be deemed indispensable, all harshness not essential shall be severely repressed.

10 No one shall be disquieted on account of his opinions, including his religious views, provided their manifestation does not disturb the established pecking order.

11 The free communication of ideas and opinions is one of the most precious of the rights of chickens. Every citizen may, accordingly, speak, write and print with freedom, but shall be responsible for such abuses of this freedom as shall be defined by Llysse.

12 The security of the rights of chickens and of the citizen requires a secure coop and run. This is, therefore, established for the good of all and not for the purposes of restricting movement.

13 Society has the right to require of every reigning cock an account of his administration.

16 A society in which the observance of the law is not assured, nor the separation of powers defined, has no constitution at all.

17 Since food is an inviolable and sacred right, no one shall be deprived thereof except where public necessity, legally determined, shall clearly demand it, and then only on condition that the owner shall have been previously and equitably indemnified.